Miracles happen! (Sort of)
The very handsome boyfriend and I recently traveled...to Connecticut. We visited the Mystic Aquarium where we saw lots of things including the inside of a beluga whale's mouth. I have to say, I found the arrangement of its teeth surprising: two vertical, parallel rows. We also visited the Submarine Museum. Oh boy. Was the very handsome boyfriend excited about going inside a submarine! Though he later admitted, "I forget I get claustrophobic until I'm inside a small, cramped space." The thing I love about submarines is how they maximize space, which, I believe, is the very thing I would hate about a submarine were I ever forced to live in one. I mean, six bunks in a space smaller than most closets? No thanks.
But perhaps the most amazing thing to happen during our trip was at the least expected place: Saks Fifth Avenue Outlet. While I was browsing the dress rack I found it: the red silk Marc Jacobs dress I had been coveting for over a year. Periodically I would look online to see if it had been discounted by 90 percent. Sadly, that never happened. But here was the dress. Before me! In my size! Deeply discounted (though not by 90 percent). I grabbed it and ran to the boyfriend, exclaiming, "Jesus is real!"
Here's a picture of said Jesus-is-real-proof dress.
The very handsome boyfriend, once he got over the fact that I'd been stalking a dress online for over a year, agreed that this was exciting. He shooed me toward the fitting room where I discovered that the dress of my dreams didn't flatter me. It made my breasts look like pudding, and while I like pudding I don't want to resemble it. Then I had a time getting the fitted dress back over said breasts. Not fun. So then I decided that if Jesus is real he's got a mean streak or a funny sense of humor. Either way, I no longer need to stalk that dress. Thanks Connecticut!